by louise*sk

“Find a penny, pick it up, all day long you’ll have good luck!”

It’s a general observation: some people are just lucky. They seem to get what they want. A friend of mine have been very lucky this past year. She used to live in London and had always dreamt of living in Paris. One day, she decides that London is not working for her anymore, she applies for 100 jobs in Paris (even though she doesn’t speak french) and 3 months later she emails me that we should grab a cup of coffee at St Paul in Le Marais because she’s now living in Paris. Job: check! She needs to find an appartment, boom the 3rd she visits is hers. And not just any appartment. One in the Montmartre area, her favorite neighbourhood of the city, it has a view over Paris and she gets to choose her flatmate. Flat: check! Oh yeah and 3 weeks after arriving to the city, she falls crazy in love with this guy who she’s with today. Love: check! Not saying she doesn’t deserve it or anything, just stating that a bit of luck was there, you have to admit.

Some people are born beauties, some are very bright, others always meet the right people at the right time… you know what I’m talking about. So you’d think that some people just find pennies and others don’t. Well don’t think that. Luck is not something that people are born with, it’s something you can find on your own!

Specialists like David Bellaiche especially, a French professor, say that luck is the “ability to create a favorable environment around one”. It’s about “opening the box of opportunities”:

1. meeting the right people
2. being on the right territories
3. listening to the right needs

And for that to happen, he suggests 4 attitudes:

• CURIOSITY: if you do the same stuff all the time, how are you going to experience something new and exciting? You should keep an eye on what’s around you.
• BEING CONNECTED: the more you interact with people, help them, bring them together, the more chances you have to meet great people.
• CHANCE DOESN’T ALWAYS WORK: accept that sometimes everything doesn’t go the way you planned it. If you look at great people who have succeeded, they have also failed a lot of times and gotten back on their feet. They have turned weak moments into strenghts (I love that philosophy).
• ANTICIPATION: people who talk about their dreams and spread the word have higher chances of making them come true as other people might easilier think of them if they find something interesting. It’s about anticipating and picturing what you want to share it and make it happen.

In a nutshell, David Bellaiche says that “luck isn’t what happens to you, it’s what you make out of it”.

I’d also add that one should be

OPTIMISTIC: if you only see the bad things happening around you, you wouldn’t even see a great deal of luck if it hit you in the head!

PROVOKE IT: you’ve got to take some risks because if you run safe all the time, it’s not very likely that something crazy will happen. If you control everything in your life, you don’t let space for anything unexpected.

Being lucky is something you make happen and a state of mind. Now go and get it.

“Quand j’aurai ce job, créé cette boîte, rencontré ce mec, perdu ces kilos, acheté cet appart…” la liste peut être longue et varie en fonction des personnes. On rêve tous d’avoir telle ou telle chose qu’on imagine nous rendra plus heureux qu’aujourd’hui. Pourtant, on le sait, ce ne sont pas des éléments extérieurs (encore moins matérielles) qui pourront nous rendront heureux. Pour moi, qu’on soit heureux ou malheureux est un choix, rien de rationnel là-dedans. C’est quelque chose qui vient de l’intérieur. Evidemment c’est parfois plus simple que d’autres et certains ont peut-être été entourés de personnes pessimistes pendant longtemps ce qui ne facilite pas les choses. Des excuses on peut toujours en trouver.

Néanmois, je repense à l’année passée et aux moments où je n’étais vraiment pas au top et finalement, oui il y avait un bon nombre d’éléments qui tombaient en même temps et qui étaient pas de chance pour moi, mais au final ce que je me dis aujourd’hui, c’est que je ne peux m’en prendre qu’à moi-même. C’est moi qui ait choisi de donner de l’importance à ces éléments et les voir de manière négative. Ce que j’essaye de faire depuis quelques années (mais apparemment j’ai des moments de faiblesses) c’est

1/ de tourner les failles en forces;

2/ ne pas subir mais agir

3/ interpréter les choses de manière positive.

De toute façon cela ne change rien aux faits, juste à mon approche (j’ai encore un peu de mal avec le point 3/ parfois mais je persévère !).

Il n’y a pas longtemps j’ai rencontré un grand optimiste qui m’a dit “il n’y a pas de mauvaise minute à passer, tout est dans l’interprétation” et c’est très vrai. Bon après on ne peut pas appliquer cette phrase à toutes les atrocités de la vie mais on peut toujours choisir de se relever. Il faut juste le vouloir. Ne pas ressasser les souvenirs négatifs et les interrogations destructrices mais juste rire de tout, s’entourer de personnes positives, qu’on aime et prendre les choses comme un jeu. C’est tellement plus agréable; pas facile tous les jours, mais hey on a toute une vie pour s’entraîner !

Cela dit, des moments moins “happy” ont leurs bons côtés aussi, tant qu’ils ne durent pas trop longtemps !

Et n’oubliez pas ce que notre personnage adoré Barney Stinson dit : ”WHEN I’M SAD, I STOP BEING SAD AND BE AWESOME INSTEAD. TRUE STORY.“

“When I have this job, created this company, met this guy, lost these kilos, bought this appartment…” the list can be long and varies according to the person. We all dream of having this or that which we imagine will make us happier than today. But it won’t, and deep inside we know it. No external elements (even less material) can buy happiness. For me, being happy is a choice, nothing rational. It’s something that comes from inside. Of course, it’s sometimes easier than others and some of you might have been surrounded by negative people for a long time which doesn’t make it easier. Excuses can always be found.

Nevertheless, I think of last year and those moments when I didn’t feel at my best and, yes there were a couple of elements that happened at the same time and that were unfortunate for me, but in the end what I think today is that I’m responsible for it. I was the one to chose to give these elements so much importance and see them negatively. What I’ve been trying to do for a couple of years (but apparently I have some weak moments) is

1/ turn your weaknesses into strength

2/ take control instead of be subjective

3/ interprete things positively.

Anyway it doesn’t change anything to the facts, just my approach (I still have some trouble with poitn 3/ sometimes but I’m persistent!).

Not long ago I met this very optimistic guy who said to me ” there are no bad minutes in life, it all lies in how you interprete them” and that’s very true. Ok so you can’t apply this sentence to all bad things that hapen in life but you can always chose to stand up after the fall. You just have to want it. Don’t brood over negative souvenirs and destructive interrogations but laugh of everything, be surrounded by positive people, that you love and take things like a game. It’s so much nicer; not easy everyday but hey we have a whole life to get better!

That said, some less “happy” moments also have good sides, as long as they don’t last too long!

And don’t forget what our favorite character Barney Stinson likes to say : “WHEN I’M SAD, I STOP BEING SAD AND BE AWESOME INSTEAD. TRUE STORY.”